I Would State the Obvious

One thing I have noticed about Food Network is that is doesn't really teach or show you how to cook. At least not entirely. You can certainly get a pretty good damn certainty about things and you might be able to impress your parents or your dog if cooking is not something that's a high priority in your life. What Food Network does, I think, is show who good cooks are and who bad cooks are. For example, Sandra Lee is a terrible cook.

Rachel Ray is an Oprah wannabe. Just an Oprah with food. She can't start a show called "Rachel's Vacation" put it on the air and say that is her vacation. She's working. It's not a vacation. Also she doesn't have to bore me any more by showing me these great places she's visiting and touring because she's so successful with her crappy cooking.

Someone who cooks is Alton Brown. Not only does he cook, but explains the scientific processes involved on why it tastes good. That's like having a science teacher who knows science and explains it, instead of just reading from the book and when asked, "Why?" they retort, "We'll get to that later."

As far as Anthony Bourdain, I'm pretty sure I watch him just to see if he is going to sleep with some random local. I still have to figure out why he has a disclaimer before his show. Are people who watch Food Network overly sensitive? Can they not take some gruff, older cook who detests some of the younger generation polluting his field of art?

Ina Garten can cook, but I get really tired of her walks and her friends and that garden of vegetables.

Bobby Flay. Flay? Really? That's his last name? I can't stand him. He sticks to traditional styles and loses to every competition he is in on his show. How come I can't have a show off this format?

That Hot Italian girl. That's it. I just watch her. I have no memory of what she has prepared or cooked. I remember once she licked chocolate off her fingers. That was a good episode.

Julia Child most certainly can cook but she appears to be a disaster waiting to happen, like everything is going to crash to the floor and she'll use her kitchen towel to clean everything up and throw it in the oven.

It's almost Tuesday, that was close.