Over the past year, my eyes have quickly been opened to the facade of American life. When I was a child, I was raised with the idea that the goal to life, the ultimate finish line, was to marry a nice girl, have some children, buy a nice house and live life at a leisurely pace. All the while the family is more cheery than the Brady Bunch. And I would accuse shows like the Brady Bunch of putting on this facade.
In reality, I've noticed something quite different. That picturesque lifestyle with the house and nice lady are pretty established no matter where you go in this country. Even the children are pretty ubiquitous. But within the walls of most of these houses is something far different than The Brady Bunch. First off I don't really see children playing outside anymore. I see them walking, I see them talking, but what happened to the kids, like my brother, who would climb trees in their new white dress pants and get their mom angry? Don't kids fall and break their arms anymore? Are they playing video games that often? Or are their parents so protective that when the child grows up to be the adult they become, they will have no self confidence? Or are the parents so pushy on having their child be an overachiever that the poor kid has no time or thoughts to themselves?
And the happy married couple? What couples? Everyone is getting divorced today it seems. The norm now is for a kid to have divorced parents and instead of his friends asking "what is he doing this weekend?" It's now "Whose house are you staying at this weekend?"
So why the facade? It's clearly not typical American life, (though I did experience a pretty close application of such an upbringing). And the mere existence of this facade does not promote the real life version. American families aren't exactly close with each other. That's the real impression I get. Perhaps it's because this country grew up in the modern age, perhaps it's just part of our identity, after all, our ancestors migrated away from their ancestors. But this facade, it doesn't exist. At least not to a large extent. So what is the American Family really like? Poor? Rich? Busy? Lazy? At this point I have no idea. All I have is my idea of how to bring my own family together, when I have one, and what to do with each passing moment. I don't plan on divorce being in the plan. I plan on overcoming obstacles. That's the way I was raised.
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ReplyDelete1) The reason the divorce rate may be higher today may be less due to the current generation's reluctance to "stick it out," and may have more to do with there being less of a stigma on divorce in society. If you think about it, 100 years ago, a woman could not divorce her husband - he was her sole source of money in many instances and if she left him she would be considered a pariah in the community. Nowadays, if a woman marries a man who she no longer wants to be with, her life is not effectively ruined. This goes the same for men, even though they were not under the same societal constraints as women.
2) I read an article recently where kids are not playing outside as much anymore because they are all inside watching the movie, "Proof of Life." Sadly, I forgot where I read this.
Signed,
London Caller